“For the want of a nail the shoe was lost,
For the want of a shoe the horse was lost,
For the want of a horse the rider was lost,
For the want of a rider the battle was lost,
For the want of a battle the kingdom was lost,
And all for the want of a horseshoe-nail.”

What’s your nail?

For me, it’s honesty in a relationship. And all of life is about relationships, partners, children, clients or bosses – it’s all relationships. I do my best to be honest and strive to uphold this spiritual value. I am certainly not pretending for a moment I get it right all the time, but I try; and when I recognise I’ve fudged or avoided, I address it.

For me a relationship has just been lost – and all for the want of a nail.  A cavalier approach with my trust is just not good enough for me.

I felt the little niggle in the back of my mind “something’s not quite right”.  And so I prodded and poked and eventually the secret was revealed.  Well let’s not pussyfoot around.  It was a lie.  And so I questioned, how many other lies had their been?  None, I was assured.  And I questioned more, and another one popped out.  “Keeping options open….. having a bet each way”, was one way of explaining it away.  But the more I pondered, the more I realised how much my mind had been signalling “all is not well”.

The outcome was the loss of a relationship – all for the want of honesty and courage and trust that the person would have been acceptable when their secret was revealed.

But when you value honesty, you ask and expect honesty to be given to you and you trust it will. Perhaps it is naïve, but the only other option is to be suspicious and distrusting of others, and I’m not prepared to do that. I’d rather face the hurt.

So what am I left feeling? Shocked, deceived, manipulated and with a loss of trust.  This I can get over and will do so quickly. Luckily, I also have friends and colleagues who are Hahnemann Healers, who can help me release these emotions so they don’t become stored in my body and to stop me becoming bitter and angry. That would be sad.

I am also very grateful to my guide, who has been quietly encouraging me to confront and question, no matter how difficult.

So I urge you not to be cavalier with the truth.  If someone asks you for honesty, please give it and give it with love. They will feel the love and that will help them accept what you are saying. The other option is far, far worse and is a world away from kindness.